guest post: plate love

How do you feel about plates on walls? I am obsessed. It has taken 8 months to convinced my husband not only that plates on walls are lovely but that we will have a plate wall in our house! Bailey has the most delightful plate/interest wall in her apartment (see pics here) - every time I am about to hang my plates I have plate wall envy and am too afraid, incase mine doesn't look as great. Of course once one has jumped on the wall plate collecting band wagon there are such amazing ones out there. Here are a few of the ones that are on my wish list.

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The spirit is too blunt an instrument

 Florence, 2 days old

The spirit is too blunt an instrument
to have made this baby.
Nothing so unskilful as human passions
could have managed the intricate
exacting particulars: the tiny
blind bones with their manipulating tendons,
the knee and the knucklebones, the resilient
fine meshings of ganglia and vertebrae,
the chain of the difficult spine.

Observe the distinct eyelashes and sharp crescent
fingernails, the shell-like complexity
of the ear, with its firm involutions
concentric in miniature to minute
ossicles. Imagine the
infinitesimal capillaries, the flawless connections
of the lungs, the invisible neural filaments
through which the completed body
already answers to the brain.

Then name any passion or sentiment
possessed of the simplest accuracy.
No, no desire or affection could have done
with practice what habit
has done perfectly, indifferently,
through the body's ignorant precision.
It is left to the vagaries of the mind to invent
love and despair and anxiety
and their pain.

by Anne Stevenson

Guest post: the twins are here!

I am so excited to get to write this post!
On Friday morning, just after 8am, two beautiful baby girls came into this world. Yes, that is right two little girls for my darling sister. The twins are so amazing, they look so different yet each are unbelievable. Their mama is a super star.
I knew her readers would be dying to hear the news and see some pics, so here they are.

As my sister attends to the most important job in the world of treasuring her new born twins, I will be guest blogging on Bury and Discover. She will check in soon to fill you in on the magical birth, life with the twins and being a mum. 

What the twins wore

Newborns in white

A place of in between

I am 37 weeks pregnant today. And I know my babes are arriving any day now. I cannot wait to meet my babes in this world, to hold their brand new bodies, smell their newborn smell. But it's a strange space to be in - the waiting. My bags are packed but my mind is not quite ready. Can you ever fully prepare for what is about to happen? For birthing two babies, for becoming a mother, for your worries to never be your own, for life never to be the same?

I love this article below (via Cup of Joe) which defines this time as the in between, the place where you still remember dreaming, where mothers wait, the first step in the process of welcoming these beings into the world. This is where I am right now.

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"The last days of pregnancy— sometimes stretching to agonizing weeks—are a distinct place, time, event, stage. It is a time of in between. Neither here nor there. Your old self and your new self, balanced on the edge of a pregnancy. One foot in your old world, one foot in a new world.

Shouldn’t there be a word for this state of being, describing the time and place where mothers linger, waiting to be called forward?

Germans have a word, zwischen, which means between. I’ve co-opted that word for my own obstetrical uses. When I sense the discomfort and tension of late pregnancy in my clients, I suggest that they are now in The Time of Zwischen. The time of in between, where the opening begins. Giving it a name gives it dimension, an experience closer to wonder than endurance.

I tell these beautiful, round, swollen, weepy women to go with it and be okay there. Feel it, think it, don’t push it away. Write it down, sing really loudly when no one else is home, go commune with nature, or crawl into your own mama’s lap so she can rub your head until you feel better. I tell their men to let go of their worry; this is an early sign of labor. I encourage them to sequester themselves if they need space, to go out if they need distraction, to enjoy the last hours of this life-as-they-now-know-it. I try to give them permission to follow the instinctual gravitational pulls that are at work within them, just as real and necessary as labor.

The discomforts of late pregnancy are easy to Google: painful pelvis, squished bladder, swollen ankles, leaky nipples, weight unevenly distributed in a girth that makes scratching an itch at ankle level a feat of flexibility.  “You might find yourself teary and exhausted,” says one website, “but your baby is coming soon!” Cheer up, sweetie, you’re having a baby. More messaging that what is going on is incidental and insignificant.

What we don’t have is reverence or relevance—or even a working understanding of the vulnerability and openness a woman experiences at this time. Our language and culture fails us. This surely explains why many women find this time so complicated and tricky. But whether we recognize it or not, these last days of pregnancy are a distinct biologic and psychological event, essential to the birth of a mother.

We don’t scientifically understand the complex hormones at play that loosen both her hips and her awareness.  In fact, this uncomfortable time of aching is an early form of labor in which a woman begins opening her cervix and her soul. Someday, maybe we will be able to quantify this hormonal advance—the prolactin, oxytocin, cortisol, relaxin. But for now, it is still shrouded in mystery, and we know only how to measure thinning and dilation.

“You know that place between sleep and awake, the place where you can still remember dreaming? That’s where I’ll always love you, Peter Pan. That’s where I’ll be waiting.”        -Tinkerbell

I believe that this is more than biological. It is spiritual. To give birth, whether at home in a birth tub with candles and family or in a surgical suite with machines and a neonatal team, a woman must go to the place between this world and the next, to that thin membrane between here and there. To the place where life comes from, to the mystery, in order to reach over to bring forth the child that is hers. The heroic tales of Odysseus are with us, each ordinary day. This round woman is not going into battle, but she is going to the edge of her being where every resource she has will be called on to assist in this journey.

We need time and space to prepare for that journey. And somewhere, deep inside us, at a primal level, our cells and hormones and mind and soul know this, and begin the work with or without our awareness."

(Read full article here). 

The most beautiful

"He found her most beautiful not when she was all fancied up, but when she wasn’t. When she was lying on the carpet, her hair all a mess, laughing about something that had happened years ago. When she wasn’t trying to impress anyone and taken down that wall that she had built for most people. That’s when he couldn’t take his eyes off of her." (via here)

{via here}

I love this. It is exactly when I find people the most beautiful - when you see their souls before you see their face or clothes or shoes. (Don't get me wrong, I certainly appreciate a pretty face, a beautiful piece of clothing, a a killer pair of heels. In fact, I used to joke that I judged a man on his hair before all else.)

As I watch my very-pregnant body change daily, I am hoping my non-fancied version is my side the husband finds most beautiful too! For the last 2 weeks, since I have been trying to stay at home as much as possible, the poor man has seen me in two outfits: pyjamas (which consist of basic underwear and any vest I can find that I can stretch over my giant dome of a bump), and comfy home clothes (which rival the pyjamas in the anti-glam factor). Fear not, I do not leave my apartment in either of these two get ups, and as such my ante natal appointments are my excuse to dress up!

But beside the clothing factor, this 37-week-pregnant-with-twins body of mine looks quite different from where we started 9 months ago. As a general rule, the measurement from the bottom off your bump, over your navel, to the top of your bump indicates how far you are in your pregnancy. My measurement is currently 45cm which basically means I am the same size as some one who was 45 weeks pregnant. While I love this big bump to bits (my sister says it makes my legs look skinnier - hee hee), it is almost like an extra body part has appeared in our relationship, making itself most noticeable when I side-hug the husband (front hugging ended a while ago), and when I have to do a sort of drop and roll when getting into our rather high bed and then over the multitude of cushions surrounding me like a fort to maximise comfort.

Last week I noticed faint stretch marks appearing around my belly button. Up until this point I thought escaped them but alas, even good genes (thanks mom!) and my endless application of jajoba oil were not enough for this twin belly. My linea nigra (a darker vertical line running vertically on the belly), on the other hand, appeared quite early on in my pregnancy but I love the look of this. And the fact that it is there to guide your baby to you once born is nothing short of miraculous. Less miraculous in the fine, light fluff that has appeared on one side of my face. I am not saying full beard here or anything, but its definitely there and particularly discernible when the sun (or bedside lamp) is providing some back lighting. 

Since the husband refers to this endearingly as my furry face, and stares in awe every time he sees this giant bump, I am taking it to mean he likes my non-fancy version too.

guest post: the royal baby

While in our family the most important mama-to-be and babies have been, without a doubt, Bailey and the twins the rest of the world has been preoccupied with Kate Middleton and the birth of the next heir to the throne! As you know by know Kate was admitted to hospital yesterday morning and after 8 hours of labour gave birth to the future King of England, a little baby boy. The media camped outside the hospital for the last few weeks and thousands of people waited at the gate of Buckingham Palace to hear the news, around the world the Great Kate Wait was trending. I can't help but feel slightly sorry for Kate. Yes she is a duchess and a future King's wife and now a mother too but can you imagine the pressure? It's announced that you are in labour and immediately The Great Kate Wait trends - poor girl, probably couldn't push any faster!

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As for the name - no confirmation yet! Apparently George and James are favourites amongst bookies!

Anyway here are some of my favourite links related to the new royal baby, Prince Cambridge.

Buzz Feed's funniest royal baby tweets so far (before the birth announcement).

Grazia's 25 things you need to know about the royal babe - written by yours truly!

The baby was announced int he traditional way - on an easel outside Buckingham Palace. Here are the pics. 

I know I work for the brand, but I kind of love the Grazia UK royal baby edition. Cute cover! 

And incase you are pregnant, take some inspiration from Kate's maternity style. I think, most of the time, she looked fantastic. I love that she wore traditional coats and cute polka dot dresses. 

The cubs' nest

Our spare room (I should probably say store room/junk room/ anything we can't find a place for in our apartment room) has been transformed into our little babes' nursery (with the help of fairy aunts and a fairy grandmother). It feels magical to me and I find myself sitting in there picturing it filled with two little souls, little sounds, little heart beats, cries, and smells, tiny bodies, and a whole lot of love. 

We didn't "decorate" the room as such. We don't know if the twins are boys or girls or both and I didn't want any particular theme. I just used things and pictures we already had, and mixed them together with things we were given. I like that it is peaceful, calm and uncluttered (let's see how long it stays that way!)

Cots and changing table from Ikea; ceramic containers from The Selection

Thick blankets over cots from Woolworths

A collection of alphabets I've found over the years

Embroidered goodnight prayer from my mom and a golden elephant from Cheska's wedding

The deer head was a birthday gift to Jan-Jan from Paris, and I bought the Manhattan print ages ago when I was still living in NY

An old chair from my gran, reupholstered in fabric from The Design Team; I bought the spotty blanket when I was in London last year; and my mom bought me the bunny cushion from a little interior store in Craighall

A springbokkie paper mobile I bought at Kamers last year

Repainted shelves filled with gift for the twins

Chalkboard labels in the cupboard from The Selection

Have a magnificent weekend

Isn't magnificent a wonderful word? I read it somewhere today and decided I need to use it more often. Although not too often so as to avoid diluting its impact.

Anyway, I digress. It's Friday again and I can't believe how quickly these days are flying. The twinlets are still safely tucked away in their watery cocoon and I am encouraging them to stay that way for another two weeks. This does however mean my activity remains at a minimum so I have no glam plans lined up for the next few days. Although I am thinking breakfast in bed will go down well - thanks husband :)

What will you be getting up to?

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Ten little links from around the web for your Friday browsing:

A crazy family home in Tribeca, NY where imagination has run wild

Did you know he was the one on your first date? Some girls do.

Speaking of first dates, this framed receipt is a sweet idea

Going travelling to another country? Pretty places I want to visit  

This book may be useful

And how handy is this gadget! We eat so many avos I should order one right now.

Wizards do exist

Painted people who look like paintings

These skirts make me long for spring (and a non-bump wardrobe!)

I need to get these animal print shoes for my niece

Useful reference for any kitchen

xxx

Maternity + style

Yes. Maternity wear and style can be out together in the same sentence. In fact, what a better time to up your style game than when showing off your gorgeous bump? I wrote this piece for Grazia in April which sums up my sentiment on this topic:

"I am 22 weeks pregnant. With twins. Which means a beautiful big bump that is only going to get bigger. And bigger. However, under no circumstances, even twin circumstances, do I feel it is acceptable to lose your sense of style during pregnancy. I say this for many reasons:

• First, pregnancy is such a wondrous time to celebrate your body – you are creating another human being! It’s a reason to show off your bigness, show off your glow, show off your bump. Your hair is lusher, your nails are stronger, your skin is glowing – you may as well have a good outfit to match.
• Second, the old adage of look good, feel good. Yes your back may ache or your digits may swell but if you are wearing a cute preggy shift, all that is more bearable. Certainly more bearable than slumping around in baggy clothes that make you feel slumpier, bigger and baggier.
• Third, stylish maternity clothes are a perfect excuse for a new wardrobe. Generations ago pregnant women were basically limited to curtain-patterned tents as maternity wear but we are so spoilt for choice now.

I am not advocating trendy get ups if that’s not who you are. I believe the same general style rules apply when you are pregnant:

- Dress for your shape, your age, your style

- A dash of lipstick goes a long way.

- Never underestimate the power of a pair of good shoes (they don’t have to be heels darling!)

- Classics are fail proof – hello skinny jeans (albeit preggy jeans with a stretchy waistband) and white shirt which will see me through many a winter’s day

- Comfort is important but this doesn’t mean sweat pants and a gym top a la Kim K."

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ASOS maternity range was my go-to option (they do ship to South Africa but you save  lot if you can find a friend willing to bring an order back for you). There is lots of choice for all occasions - dress up, casual and work wear. The prices are comparable to maternity wear in SA. I found the sizes to generally be spot on although 2 pairs of pants just didn't work.

Here's a selection of dresses, tops and pants from their site at the moment that I love:

I found basics the most useful, with a few unique pieces with which to mix and match - I lived in my stretchy jeans and black leggings! This jacket would have been great to have.

Hapy birthday Tata Madiba!

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A checklist for any age

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"Forgive. Forget. Fake it. Chin up. Wear lipstick, make lists, make sure your voicemail isn’t full. Mix protein shakes, send timely thank you notes, sip drinks more slowly, stare at adults’ eyebrows, smile without dimples, develop perfect posture. Be gracious, be kind, eliminate self-pity. Look in the mirror and shift your internal monologue from ‘How do I look?’ to ‘This is my face,’ from ‘What the hell am I doing?’ to ‘This is my life.’ Capitalize your emails, read the news, walk briskly, stay focused, and never, ever let on that you are somewhat lost and sometimes lonely and so completely confused (and would someone please just let me know what it is I’m supposed to do next, where exactly I’m supposed to go). Just keep going. Go, and do not stop." Jennifer Schaffer, A Checklist for the age 19

Seeing double

There are some things in life you never imagined yourself doing. Preparing for our twinkies to arrive has brought upon quite a few of those:

1. Installing two car seats in the back of the car and crying about it. Fear not, they were not tears of sadness, perhaps a few of overwhelmed-ness but mostly because the sight of these two seats literally tugs at my heart.

2. Watching the husband build two cots on a Friday night. Now although the husband lived in London for a good while, he somehow never built IKEA furniture (!?). Watching him build our two IKEA cots made me look at him differently, perhaps it was the first glance of his impending role as a dad? Whatever it was I think it made me love him even a bit more than I already did. Seeing two cots set up in our nursery was also a very real indicator that there would be two real babes in those two cots.

3. Snuggling up with two soft bunnies at the age of thirty. No, this is not for my own comfort (although it is undoubtedly comforting I will admit). The idea behind sleeping with these bunnies is so they can smell like me in the instance that one or both of our babes has to go to ICU. Smell is a baby's strongest sent and since they already know my smell, the bunnies will feel somewhat familiar to them if we have to be separated.

4. Receiving two big, beautiful bunches of flowers. One the day we found out we I was pregnant with twins, my mom sent these two bouquets to our apartment. I was feeling on top of the world and it was such a lovely thing to come home to.

5. Being doubly spoilt by my wonderful family and friends. I am really touched as how generous people have been to us - giving us not only one of a gift but two! Not to mention all the kind words of support and thoughts from my lovely readers :)

Weekend time

Wishing all my lovely readers a happy weekend. My giant dome is preventing me from being that social so I am going to be chilling out this weekend. The nursery also needs to be finished! I had some practice contractions last night (EEEK!) so packed my bag today - at least that is ready.

I am sure you will be getting up to more exciting antics than resting weary feet and folding baby swaddles. So whatever it is - have fun. Be good. And have a glass of champagne for me.

{Photo by Pia Ulin via here}

Weekly round up of 10 links:

Some more amazing Lego designs (birds! iPhones! wedding dresses!)

If winter is getting you down, take a look at this sunshine map of Europe

A beautiful vertical garden

When typography and food come together

Work spaces of the famous creative set

Intricate design of a Persian rug on a whiteboard

Are you watching the Tour De France? I love these posters for the race

A Coke vending machine brings India and Pakistan together

Good advice for a happy marriage

What a fun idea to add a little sparkle to your cupcakes

xoxo

35 weeks

I am 35 weeks pregnant this week. Which means the babes will be arriving so soon. It is quite a thing walking around in public with my giant twin dome. Many stare and often comment - I don't mind but feel I should have at T shirt that says "It's twins people."

I can't imagine that my bump can get even bigger but I am hoping to keep the twinlets in for at least another 2 or 3 weeks to make sure they are as healthy and strong as possible. How do I plan on doing this?

1. Talk to the babies (it is much warmeer and calmer in there that out here in this crazy world)
2. Walk very slowly. I am like a giant ship in the night.
3. Keep driving and outings to a minimum - then feet up and rest
4. Stay calm. And breathe.
5. Stop yoga (Note - This was a hard decision as yoga has really helped me throughout my pregnancy but I am listening to my instincts. If I was pregnant with one I am sure I would be doing downward dogs until I went into labour. But I am at risk of these babes coming early,  squats, hip openers and cervix softening visualisations made me a bit concerned.)

These are easier said than done. I still have a to-do list that keeps growing - you know all that admin that you keep putting off until you realise that if you don't sort it out now you will never get a chance to do it? Besides, sorting out admin does nothing for ones nerves - my medical aid actually made me cry today after being on the phone for the better part of an hour. The nursery is still not done (roping in my sister/mom team this weekend to finish up). And the bags are not packed! (I don't think my last minute packing technique will be suited to this situation). And our name search continues...

Beyond all these practical things, the thought of two babies arriving is not exactly calm-inducing either. Two babies! TWO. Arriving on earth in just two or three weeks to change our lives forever. Joy. Excitement. Fear. Hope. Love. Anxiety. Peace. Worry. Happiness. Nerves. Amazement. Love. Excitement. Take your pick...

PS. Check out our my maternity shoot on Emma Jane Nation (I can't believe how tiny my bump was then). Thank-you Emma for a lovely post :)

bare legs, bakeries and ice-cream

I haven't been very conscientious about keeping up to date with my photographs on B&D. I still have pics from last year I want to share. I console myself with the following thoughts:

a) somethings don't go out of date
b) I think my posts are better when I share what I feel like blogging today, and not what I "should" blog
c) there are no rules in my little land of B&D - to me that's half the fun of blogging

So, now that I am done with that little explanation, here are some snaps from a wonderful summer's day we spent in Kalk Bay when we were in CT in March. Kalk Bay holds a special place in my heart as I have wonderful memories of escaping there while I was studying at Stellenbosch, to indulge in a day of vintage store browsing, Cafe Olympia lunch, or a stroll in the harbour.

This time around we joined a bunch of friends for lunch at the cool, casual Live Bait Restaurant, just under the more formal Harbour House Restaurant but with an equally beautiful view across across the bay. After a long, lazy meal we strolled through town and finished off with coffees from Olympia Bakery, and (my favourite), yummy ice-creams from the Ice Cafe.

 

Round food

Come to think of it, I love round food - juicy winter oranges, Woolworths chuckles, perfect scoops of creamy gelato, tomatoes, eggs... So much so, one year I thought it would be good to give up round things for Lent (that didn't actually happen). I was reminded of that when I came across this competition, where Cereal asked readers to submit pictures of round food. The mangosteen won but they all look beautiful to me.

What are you reading?

"She loved to walk down the street with a book under her arm. It had the same significance for her as an elegant cane for the dandy a century ago. It differentiated her from others."

 Milan Kundera, The Unbearable Lightness of Being 

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What are you reading at the moment? I have just finished Flight Behaviour by Barbara Kingsolver. She is one of my favourite authors - no matter what the story is (and they are all so different) her writing is so delicate and real I can't put her books down.

In between baby books (naming books, sleeping books, twin books!) I am starting to read Sheryl Sandberg's Lean In, given to me by my darling friend Miss T. I am particularly interested in reading this book because of the debate that seem to surround it. However, as I switch between learning about feeding schedules for twins and this book about grabbing opportunities as a woman, I can't help feeling it is perhaps it is not the best choice of reading material right after resigning from one's job! On the other hand, who know what great ideas it may inspire :)

Weekend time

Brrr winter arrived in Jo'burg this morning with her her steely grey skies and icy stare. Pretty much the perfect weather for curling up on your couch with a grey blanket (I do like to match the skies darlings) and a cup of steaming lemon tea. Which is what I am doing right now. Not such perfect weather for actually leaving the house and running chores. Which is what I need to do in the next 30 minutes.

Apparently winter's stay is just on a day trip and the weekend promises warmer temps. What are your plans? The husband and I are going to watch Great Gatsby - I remember reading the book as teenager and certain scenes remain so clear in my mind I am intrigued to see how the movie  portrays them. Tomorrow we are attending a CPR/Survival course which the nerd mom-to-be in me is kind of looking forward to. And of course it's essential when I think of these two tiny lives we will be responsible for.

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Here are some links from around and about if you feel like a browse:

Cereal Magazine visits Babylonstoren

A good reason to relax

The "Art of the Brick" exhibition takes Lego to a whole new level

Haha. I am a big hair person and have totally been there.

What the greats learn from the greats

Playing with scale - Big Appetites makes you look twice

Outdoor piano concerts on the streets of NY this summer

Logos without names

Easy dinner party idea that I will be stealing

The beauty of abandonment

Have a lovely weekend. Keep warm. xoxo